Ivi

 At school, I was never been one of the “popular” kids. Always had my special friends, one at a time. Never belonged to a crowd of kids. When I was in primary school, my best friend was Ivi. She was, if I remember rightly, of Latvian background. Her family and mine were totally different, and I think that intrigued me. Ivi slept in the lounge on a couple of chairs. She didn’t have her own room. There wasn’t enough room for her to have one. She had an older sister. I remember we used to steal her sister’s cigarettes until she was allowed to smoke and then she stopped hiding them in her drawer, and dobbed us in. We were really quite pissed off about that. It was okay for her to smoke behind their parent’s back, but not okay for us.

 I always felt that Ivi was lucky. Her parents didn’t care what she did. They never gave her a time to be home. I often felt my parents were too painfully strict. I had to be home at certain times, couldn’t go out on school nights. Real mean things like that.

 Ivi and I tried to get into a lot of trouble. I was really quite hopeless at getting into trouble. Always scared of getting caught.

 And we did !! Shoplifting lollies from the local supermarket. I mean how stupid. We took them from the supermarket my mother used. We got caught, as do many 12 year olds. The owner of the shop locked us in a dark cupboard and left us there, saying he was going to call the police. You can imagine the fear in these two youngsters. “We should have given fake names”. “What’s going to happen”. “Mom will kill me”. I don’t even remember either of us trying the door to see if it was locked or not. We just waited patiently for our fate.

 For what seemed like hours, we waited. Suddenly the door opened, and there he was again. Gave us a lecture. Said he had decided against calling the police, but that if he ever saw us in his store again, he would. Off we went. Two very relieved little girls.

 My problem was, what to tell my mother the next time she wanted me to go grocery shopping with her. I was really glad when we moved from that house and she used a different store.

 I also remember one mat night (for those who don’t know mat night is the night before Halloween. The idea is that you go around playing tricks, soaping car windows and stealing door mats). I told my parents I was going to Ivi’s house and she told her parents she was going to my house. Two very brave little girls managed to steal one mat and soap one car window before we chickened out. But we did it.

 As we headed for high school, I was put in the advanced classes and Ivi was put in the “commercial”. This was for girls who would never amount to anything other than typists. Those who were seen as less intelligent than those of us in the academic classes. Year 8 began the distancing. Ivi became more and more interested in boys and the other things that went along with boys. I was being pushed more to study and learning.

 A few years later, I met Ivi again. She was wearing very very heavy make up, very tight clothes, was drinking, living on her own, and I suspect might have been doing some work as a hooker and quite probably into drugs. We only needed to spend one afternoon together to realise how far apart our lives had gone and how little we now had in common.

 I was still the good girl, Ivi was the bad girl. Part of me envied her freedom. She was 15, lived alone, no parents to tell her what to do. She had left school. I don’t remember if she was working or not. I was still in school with another couple of years before I could look for the freedom of work and living on my own.

 I can remember us standing at the mirror together, Ivi wanting to put the real black eye make up on me, and me knowing it just wasn’t me. But part of me wanting to be this “bad” girl who wore short skirts and heavy make up. Who could come onto the boys by being sexy and inviting. Another part of me feeling very uncomfortable with the idea.

 I often wonder what happened to her. I’ve worked with many women like Ivi. Girls who opt out from “normal” society. Who take to drugs, alcohol and sex. Some made it, some didn’t. I hope Ivi did.

 Madeleine

Wednesday, 8 February 2006

Thanks Kazza for the picture

I am a very lazy housekeeper and always have been. For many years I tried to do it “properly” but never managed to achieve the “look” that some of these houses have. You know, everything in it’s place, Monday washing, Tuesday shopping, put something away as soon as you’ve finished. All that sort of stuff. I’ve got a book that has been quite useful. It’s called “The I hate to housekeep book” and it has some lovely tips in it.

So here are some of mine and I welcome any additions to add to my list and to share with others who have the same problem as me.

1. When you clean, start with a different room every time. You never know when the urge to clean will leave you and this way, each room eventually does get done.
2. Use the vacuum as much as possible. Clean ashtrays, tables, benches, walls, cob webs etc. Vacuums were made to make life easier.
3. Hang your clothes on racks rather than on the line. When you put clothes on the line, you have to take them out of the washing machine, put them in a basket, take the basket to the line, hang out the clothes (and summer in Australia is a bugger standing at the line), then put the basket away. When the clothes are dry, you have to bring them in, fold them and put them away. My way, you bring the rack to the washing machine, hang the clothes on the rack, put the rack on the patio and you are done. You don’t even have to put the clothes away, cause you just take them off the rack and put them on your body.
4. Never dry dishes. You only use a certain number of dishes, so you leave them in the drainer and use your dishes from the drainer. Saves putting them away, and then taking them out again.
5. Putting things away when you’re finished is fine, if you are finished with it. However if it is something you are still working on, if you put it away, you have to take it out again when you want to do some more work on it. Also if you put it away, you will just forget about it and it adds to the rubbish that is hiding in cupboards – all those unfinished projects.
6. Never wash windows. It is a waste of water and birds don’t see clean windows and are likely to commit hari kari on your nice clean windows. Dirty windows are environmentally friendly.
7. Car boots (trunk to Americans) make great secondary pantries. When you get your groceries, make sure you separate out anything that needs to go in the fridge. When you get home, take them in and put them away (of course). The rest can stay in the boot of the car til you need them.
8. If you turn the fan on while you're sitting at the kitchen table it blows everything off, then you don't need to clear it!! (Thanks KazzaBear for that one Kaz' Comments).(Madeleine’s addition – if you put a box there, the stuff will fall into the box, and voila)
9. Pins were invented so people didn’t have to sew
10. Vacuum cleaners are part of the family. They should be always on show, and plugged in on a long extension cord to be used at a moment’s notice.
11. Closets, under beds, and storage room are properly used to hide the junk you don’t want company to see (Biggie T)
12. For the visually impaired. Don't put in your contacts or wear your glasses. (ChandaBear). I recommend not driving while using this one.
13. A quick run through with the leaf blower from kitchen to front door scoots fur beasts and dog toy guts as well as fur balls from the fur kids (BiggieT)
14. Fabreze is a reasonable substitution for laundering guest towels and slipcovers. out quickly (BiggieT)
15. When washing blouses and shirts, immediately shake well and hang on hangars. No ironing needed and they can either stay hanging in the doorway until used next or just be hung quickly in the wardrobe.
16. Keep the lid closed on the toilet - that way you don't know it is dirty (Johnnie)
17. Clean the crumbs from the toaster with the vacuum cleaner. (Glorious Dan).
18. Let the kids or grandkids draw in the dust on the tables. save it as ART (Kelly J)
    
19. Always have a dog. They are great at helping clean up spilled food, pre-washing dishes for you. I could go into some of the more revolting things dogs can help clean up, but I won’t. I will leave it to your imagination (Fedelmia)

That’s all I can think of for the moment. I’m sure there are more, and I would love to hear them and add them to my list. I will make sure people know who they are from.

And thanks everyone for their help compiling this list. Remember to print out the latest version Wayf.

Madeleine

Sunday, 5 February 2006

And I forgot my camera

 I went to the food hall with friends for dinner tonight. Before I left, I picked up my camera, thought about bringing it, and decided not to. Bad decision.

 Shortly after I arrived, we could see a group of young people gathering outside with what appeared to be costumes in their hands. Now many of the stalls in this food hall are Asian, and the local dragons were coming to bless the stalls, and to give them good luck for the coming year.

 They danced around the stalls, went inside, into the cooking areas and then came out again. Now these are small stalls. And these were big dragons. So they really just fitted in.

 The sound of the drum felt like it went through my bones after a while. Each stall had a cabbage above. The dragons danced, the drums beat. I don’t understand what the dancing meant, but it was quite impressive. The others with me had seen this before, but I hadn’t and was entranced. At a certain point, half the dragons stretched to their full height and grabbed the cabbages from the top of the stalls, All six dragons then fell to the ground, and were quiet for a time. At the sound of a whistle, three of them raised themselves up and spat the cabbage at the stall and stall holders.

 Then they danced to the other stalls, found their cabbages and repeated the process. They then danced their way through the food hall seating and found another cabbage hanging from the ceiling. Presumable this was the blessing for the building itself.  When they left, they all danced their way out of the food hall backwards.

 I remember seeing one little girl with her hands over her eyes, crying. Mother smiling and comforting the tot. For a non-Asian, this must have been as frightening as Santa Claus would be for children from cultures that don’t understand our ways.

 I’m not sure of the history behind this dance or the meaning behind the music and the dance. But, as I said earlier, I was entranced. When the dragons had moved beyond the stall where I was going to buy my dinner, I went up and asked the woman a couple of questions. I could hardly hear her, so the questions were wasted. However, she gave me a little red envelope and told me to put some money in and give it to the dragon. For good luck. And the thought of approaching one of those dragons, quite frightened me. I knew they were just young people wearing a costume, but there was a sense of anxiety about approaching one.

 When you watched the dancing, it was quite amazing. Two people, keeping time, the one behind probably couldn’t see where he was going and would have to trust the “head”. On reaching up to get the cabbage from the ceiling, the “head” had to literally jump up on the “tail” to reach.

 I walked over and stood at the front of the crowd that was watching, holding my little red envelope in front of me, and one of the dragons came over and from his mouth, reached a hand, took my little red envelope, and then the dragon nuzzled me ever so gently and slightly.

 How to express my amazement. How to put into words, the feeling of the music. Because it was a feeling, not a sound. The sense of awe at the dragons, even while knowing they were just costumes. Hard to express.

 And I forgot my camera.

 Madeleine

Friday, 3 February 2006

Blog Stalking

 I’ve just thought of a new potential crime. We have people who stalk other people. They go to their house, follow them when they go out, manage to be at the same place at the same time. They are called stalkers. Most are harmless. They have an obsession with someone, and need to be near them. So they study the person’s habits so they can meet up with them, they drive past their house (I used to do that to boys when I was a teenager, walk, not drive) and their behaviour can be quite frightening.

 I was just thinking that someone can do that on blogstream as well. Maybe these are some of the criteria for a blog stalker (and I’m not talking about A1 either, she seems to have disappeared off the face of the stream and seems pretty harmless).

• Is there someone who always puts a comment on your blog immediately you post one?

• Is there someone who seems to always comment on other people’s blogs around the same time that you do?

• Do you ever get the sense that someone is following you?

• Is there someone who always comments on your blog, no matter what you post?

• Anybody send you a lot of PM’s?

• You will definitely be on their list of Blogs they like

• Anyone sending you pretty e-cards?

• Anyone tell you that they feel so bad when you don’t post that they want to kill themselves?

 If any of these things are happening to you,

BEWARE 

You may have someone stalking you on your blog.

 

Madeleine

Wednesday, 1 February 2006